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#Couplegoals: Instagram dating

Instagram is one big thirst trap, and we should treat it as such. As in, that beach selfie you just posted with your puppy probably got A LOT of ‘likes’, right? 

That snap of you eating tortilla chips captioned ‘werk it’? Why not! Give the people what they want. These lowkey dating app vibes make Instagram dating a thing, with the potential to attract more thirsty matches through the private story feature and direct messaging. 


But how to talk to people on Instagram in a way which makes them thirsty and not creeped out? As long as it’s respectful and kind, Instagram flirting isn’t an issue. And it’s worth playing the long game – limber up over the course of a few cheeky likes here and there before throwing in a well-timed comment. Maybe a scroll of their grid has revealed something they’re into. Drop a little hint in a private story that you’re digging it. 

Knowing how to flirt on Instagram is basically avoiding anything that you wouldn’t do IRL. If you wouldn’t walk up to a random person on the street and shove an aubergine in their face, you probably shouldn’t do it online (if you would, have a word with yourself). 

It’s also worth remembering the highly curated nature of Insta… while we get a more detailed profile compared to most dating apps, it’s still be designed to appear a certain way. Have reasonable expectations for when you eventually get to meet IRL. 

You’re all set to become #couplegoals with this basic guide to Instagram flirting.

You’re all set to become #couplegoals with this basic guide to Instagram flirting.


Effective flirting on Instagram comes down to what happens in the DMs, and there are a few things worth bearing in mind:


  1. ‘Like’ responsibly. It’s an iconic social media move and a great place to start, but the humble ‘like’ shouldn’t be taken lightly. Liking a photo or two on their profile is a decent way to let them know that you’re thinking of them. But hitting ‘like’ on pictures from months or even years ago will likely come across as a wee bit creepy. So, if you really want to know how to get girls on Instagram or attract the fellas, go easy with the ‘liking’, and be sincere with it. Less is more.
  2. Slide into their DMs. Once you’ve liked a couple pictures, ease your Instagram flirting into direct messaging. If you aren’t sure how to message a girl on Instagram or that guy you’ve been vibing with, it’s actually not as difficult as it seems. Aim for something sincere, a witty joke, or a conversation triggered by a recent photo that you ‘liked’ – anything that avoids sounding like some Insta bot.
  3. Leave a comment. After the DM, keep up the flirting on Instagram with a comment on their photo. Don’t overthink it, but if there’s an opportunity to leave a short, witty message, go for it. If you want to know how to talk to people on Instagram aside from DM-ing, commenting on photos is a great way to do it. And this isn’t limited to grid posts – get involved in that story action for Insta flirting goals.
  4. Take it offline. Learning how to get girls or guys on Instagram comes with the expectation or hope that you will eventually date them. If you think the chat is going well, ask for their number. A simple, “want to take this offline?” works just fine.

    You’re all set to become #couplegoals with this basic guide to Instagram flirting.